The strongest ‘pound for pound’ muscle is the uterus: it weighs around 2 pounds but during childbirth can exert a downward force of 400 Newtons, which is one hundred times as strong as gravity and equivalent to the power in a fully extended modern longbow.
Indeed, the idea of ‘winning the girl’ – of overcoming female objections or resistance through repeated and frequently escalating efforts – is central to most of our modern romantic narratives. (Female persistence, by contrast, is viewed as pathetic.) And the more I think about instances of creepiness, harassment and stalking that culminate in either the threat or actuality of sexual assault, the more I’m convinced that a massive part of the problem is this socially sanctioned idea that men are fundamentally entitled to persist. Because if men are meant to persist, then women who say no must only be rejecting the attempt, not the man himself, so that every separate attempt becomes one of a potentially infinite number of keys which might just fit the lock of the woman’s approval. She’s not the one who’s allowed to say no, not really; she should be silent and passive as a locked door, waiting patiently while the man runs through however many keys he can be bothered trying. And if he gets sick of this lengthy process and just breaks in? Well, frustration under those circumstances is only natural. Either the door shouldn’t have been there to impede him, or it shouldn’t have been locked.
I want queer people to be able to turn on the tv and see themselves.
i want them to be able to watch a shitty romantic comedy with an obvious plot and see themselves, to watch a serious tv show about vampire killing FBI agents and see themselves, to watch a fairytale kid’s movie and see themselves-
i want queer people to count as people outside of shitty, offensive dramas that see queerness as a gate to more drama, something all-defining and life-ruining, written by writers who don’t care enough to learn what’s a stereotype and what’s reality and still want cookies for putting goddamn cardboard cuttouts on their show-
and i want that queerness to be evident and unarguable.
i don’t want shitty backhanded references to a dude’s “friendliness” with his best friend-
i don’t want half-hearted mentions of a main character’s gay friend in an attempt to prove that the character and that the show aren’t homophobic-
I don’t want queerbaiting, that straight viewers can claim was just a joke, because it was, it’s just a joke the show can profit off for “representing” someone they don’t even fucking count as enough of a person to deserve to be treated with respect-
And i want queer ladies and queer dudes and genderqueer queers and i want them to be different races and classes and have different goals and opinions and lifestyles and fashion choices and interests and lives and challenges, because queer people are not one, shitty, poorly done stereotype
I want to count as a fucking person
i want every single queer person to count as a fucking person
a person whose story isn’t a joke, isn’t something to be ashamed of, isn’t something you see once in an afterschool special about not bullying people, until they get “turned straight” or “fixed” or “just hadn’t met the right person” or fucking kill themselves or turn out to be the villain if they “stay queer” because being queer means one has to be ‘punished’ for it-
I want us to fucking count, and i want the media to acknowledge we count.